Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Toenail amputation (not mine)

After club sectionals on Sunday, Bryan had a bloody toenail so he disinfected a drill bit with rubbing alcohol and then drilled his toenail to let the blood out and relieve pressure. Just in case you're wondering, he didn't use the actual drill, just the drill bit. Then on Monday morning his toe was twice its normal size, red and puffy, and obviously infected. He was limping around all day so Monday night Keith drove me and Bryan to the ER. Last thing he said was, "Make sure you get the hot doctor." Bryan: "Hot doctor, alright, got it."

At the ER (paraphrased):
Hot doctor (she was actually hot): Yep, that's definitely infected. So what were you doing??
B: I was playing ultimate frisbee, wearing cleats that were too small for my giant pancake-like feet
HD: Whoa, then what did you do?
B: I drained my toe with a drill bit
HD: Good job! That's what we would've done
B: Yessss
HD: Wow, that takes a lot of concentration... I can't believe you drilled your toe
B: Um, just so you know, I just used the drill bit, not the entire drill
HD: Ohhhhh I was thinking you took an electric drill to your foot. That would require a lot of focus...

Then they gave him oxycodone ("which will make you a bit loopy") and then a few minutes later, gave him local anesthetics on both sides of his big toe. She then explained that the pus is basic and the anesthetics are acidic so sometimes the anesthetics are neutralized and isn't that effective (great...).

HD: I'm going to drain the pus from your toe, and I'm going to try to leave the toenail, but just so you know, it might have to come off.
B: Okay...
HD: Tell me if it hurts okay?
B: What?! I thought it's numbed...
HD: Well, it is... just tell me if it hurts
B: Okay...

I tried distracting Bryan by bringing out his laptop and watching Alias on it but I dont' think it was working because he just kept his eyes closed and fists clenched the entire time. I was peaking around the laptop screen to see what was going on and it was probably the most disgusting thing I ever saw. His toenail did eventually have to come off (she just used scissors and cut it off). Then a huge glob of neosporin antibacterial stuff went on the nailbed cavity and then she wrapped it in a bunch of gauze and tape.

HD: Do you want to see it [your amputated toenail]?
B: Uh. No. Karen do you want to see it?
K: I already saw it :( :( :(

He got pain meds from CVS this morning so if you see Bryan you should aim for the times that he takes the oxycodone because he is a bit more loopy than usual and it's kinda entertaining :)